Funny. The feeling did not even last a day. I have finally accepted my bitterness I think. I am almost fine. I put the feeling on hold for the time being. My bitterness is overpowering my ability to think straight and process things reasonably. By now I usually ignore the source of the problem in order to be okay. I don't know if I'll be seeing him today, but if I do my current mood should give me what I need to talk to him, ha! And we'll see how it goes from there. But I don't know if he's going today since he wants to go to some show. Which I also want to go to but decided not to cause of my usual Friday plans. I feel like I should have taken the initiative to say "Let's go together" but I felt that would be too forward. And him not asking me got me all :( But with my usual Friday plans I don't really feel like going either. And it's not because he might not go! The usual people I go with aren't going and that scares me. I don't want to face all these new people by myself. At the same time I don't not want to go cause of my fear you know? I should grow up and man up! But the last time that happened I was a bit bummed..so it adds on to my not wanting to go.
I am a bit ticked with a friend of mine. I will name the friend "A" for obvious reasons. As much as I am ticked with A I feel I don't have the right to be. I am ticked because A has been MIA and A hasn't been trying to be there for me. But it's been like this for a while now and I haven't really been there for A either. We are both busy people so if we have something to say we just usually tell each other. We don't ask each other what's up. You know? And I haven't been seeing A regularly and I sort of just got used to it. I would ask A to hang out but more than not A was unable to.Now I feel myself getting jealous because A makes time to see other folks, but not me.
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